Advising People To Prepare Is Not Victim Blaming

nabil-abdulrashid-2009-octoberAdvising people to prepare for bad situations they’re likely to face isn’t victim blaming.

Harassment whether racial or sexual is disgusting and wrong and nobody should have to face it. But refusing to look into ways to prepare for these situations on the grounds that you shouldn’t learn to avoid the crime, report the crime, defend yourself against the crime or survive the crime but rather people who commit them should learn not to commit them is illogical and pretty stupid.

I should be able to leave my home or sleep at night without locking my door, but I still lock it because nobody will ever teach all burglars not to burgle.

I shouldn’t have to be harassed by police officers for no damn reason but I’ve learned the law and loopholes/ technicalities around stop and search so I can defend myself against police and have an idea what to do when they harass me. I’ve learned my rights so I know when what they’re doing is illegal and every single time I see it happen I react and call it out, being critical of those who don’t make the same efforts as me is NOT victim blaming.

Stop teaching people that it’s okay to be cowardly. If someone has experienced trauma then encourage them to get help for it and regain their confidence. I respect people who admit they are the way they are because of fear. But those of you who hide behind all your millennial jargon and faux intellectual feminist rhetoric are ridiculous.

Stop intellectualising the fact that you’re a coward, you guys are good allies in Facebook debates (sometimes) but are useless everywhere else. Stop teaching kids not to hit bullies back and that they need a “safe space”, in this world your only safe space is your house and even that isn’t always safe.

Now go on, be offended.

~ Nabil Abdul-Rashid



4 thoughts on “Advising People To Prepare Is Not Victim Blaming

  1. Salaam. I disagree, we need to put as much emphasis on teaching society not to bully those of minority backgrounds/women because it actually is a method of preventing future attacks.
    We need to put giving people an understanding of equality first. But I agree on that people who are more likely to be victims of abuse need to be stronger and defend themselves with the law etc.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Wa alaykumus salaam Leila,

      I take your point, but in reality such an approach would take decades to have any effect, people need to cope in the mean time.

      As well as this, some people just don’t want to learn, they are happy or at least content in their ignorance and sometimes someone needs to remonstrate with them and their words and behavior in stronger terms to teach them the error of their ways.


  2. I agree that not teaching people how to defend themselves because everyone should be respected is unsafe. Unless we live in a utopia this will never be possible. People who do wrong know they do wrong. Rapists, murderers, drug dealers, and thieves don’t end up in prison because they just didn’t know what they did was wrong. in fact, they do everything they can to conceal their crimes. So it’s safe to say that as long as humans exist so will these types of humans. ‘Educating’ them will not change their behavior. However, I disagree that everything about feminism is faux. While Islam gives women every right they need the western world has not. If it had not been for the feminist movement western women would have virtually no rights. Do I have criticisms about feminism? Yes, probably enough to fill an entire page but not every aspect of feminism has been flawed. Islam is just now starting to take hold in the west. So, imagine living as a woman with no rights. Then you would understand western feminism and the anger and angst behind it.


    1. I see your points, and why you see feminism as an ally or at least a fellow traveler in this struggle

      I see the idea of some areas of cooperation, but if we reference matters through feminist thought processes, language and solutions we are not bringing an islamic solution to the problem which is what the problem and needs.


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